Updated: Mar 1, 2020
I recently had a conversation with someone who told me that a mutual acquaintance declared that the insights and thoughts I share online are “just a bunch of cliches.”
I’ll admit that really stung at first. I found myself wondering whether the affirmations, inspirations and truisms that stir me so much that I can’t wait to shout them from the rooftops don’t really resonate with others. Or that maybe I’m not really being as authentic as I believe I am and everyone can just see right through me.
Are you with me on any of this?
Then I read this passage in the most amazing book You Are a Badass by Jen Sincero (seriously, read this book!):
“I have a friend who had the word ‘Duh’ tattooed on the inside of her upper arm in homage to the fact that all of our big ah-ha moments are no-brainers; ‘Fear is a choice!’ ‘I am lovable!’ ‘Don’t worry, be happy!’ Every time she high-fives, or lifts her arm to see if she needs a shave, she gets reminded of how often the sublime lies waiting in the obvious. [emphasis mine]
You know countless of these truisms of which I speak, you’ve heard them or thought them a million times, but when they finally sink in and you ‘get it,’ they suddenly become earth-shattering news.”
Ummmm yeah. I let that sit with me. And I realized a few things...
I’m not doing this for you.
When I decided to completely pivot my advertising career and go into business for myself as a coach, the #1 reason may surprise you. It wasn’t so I could “change the world” or “make a difference.” That was actually the #2 reason. The #1 reason was so that I could take full advantage of my potential. So that I could be in control of my life. So that I could decide what I was worth earning. Dictate my own schedule. Create whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted, and be content in the knowledge that the only one I needed to please with all of it is me.
To create my own life, on my own terms, and to share the Truth I’ve discovered with the world simply for the joy of expression.
Now, all that said, of course I want to make a difference. It was, after all, a powerful motivator to do what I do. But I also know that my message will call to my people. The ones who are seeking something more, desperate to step into their amazing potential, and motivated to make some massive changes to that end. And they just need a little help. And what I share is a beacon for them.
And as a side note, if you haven’t figured it out yet, most of the things I write and share are created because I’m the one who needs to read and internalize them.
I’m not for everyone.
Truth is, if you’re a person who rolls your eyes when you hear, see or read these platitudes, then we’re probably not that compatible. If you’re someone who smirks when you read posts meant to inspire and allow you to step outside your current reality, but your current reality is not exactly what you want it to be, and you can’t come to terms with that, well, I’m probably not the coach for you.
And I am 100% ok with that. I won’t judge you or try to convince you otherwise. I’m just gonna keep on sharing these truths with people who will see them with fresh eyes, internalize them, and allow themselves to be open to making seismic shifts and receiving everything they desire in life.
Your cliche is someone else’s Truth.
I’ve heard a lot of these quotes and affirmations before and maybe never really processed them or didn’t really believe them or had lots of excuses as to why they weren’t true for me.
But when they finally sank in and I “got it,” (as Jen Sincero so aptly stayed) I suddenly felt the uncontrollable fire to share them widely.
You know when Scrooge woke from being visited by the three Christmas ghosts and couldn’t wait to spread his joy far and wide and start living his life fully? It’s like that.
Ever notice how easy it is, when you’re wallowing in the mess of your life, to see someone else’s positivity, motivation, success, or sheer joy and roll your eyes? Yeah, I’ve been there too. You find yourself wondering why everything always seems to go well for them and you can’t seem to catch a break. Maybe you criticize, question their motives, view them with skepticism because “oh here we go again; on and on with this trite mumbo jumbo...and it’s all just a load of crap anyway.”
Or is it? Are you silently wondering if maybe there’s just a teeny tiny bit of truth to it? Maybe when everything is still and quiet, you get just a glimmer of a notion that these “cliches” are actually Truth (with a capital T), and that’s exactly why this other person is having a completely different life experience than you are?
I’ll let you sit with that for a minute.
We’ve heard these quotes and affirmations and seen them on inspirational posters, and there is literally nothing new or even all that unique about them. But they have become platitudes and truisms for a reason, and that reason is they are true. We can view them through a cynical lens, but it doesn’t change their truth.
If you only see cliches, I could guess that you also may not be living and experiencing their truth. That’s not a judgment. It either is your reality or it isn’t.
And if these truths aren’t your reality, consider picking some different lenses through which to view life and the world around you.
Whether or not you believe something is true does not change the Truth. The world was round even when everyone believed it was flat. The original people who wrote or spoke that truth did so because they experienced its power first hand.
When it finally sinks in and you “get it,” everything will look different to you , and you’ll be so overcome with joy that you’ll want to share it with everyone.
If that sounds like something you’d like to experience, give me a call.